Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize