Please, let me fuck your mom
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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