yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
