the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
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dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
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Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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