mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize