We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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