I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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