if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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