Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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