My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
