Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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