When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
