she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
