Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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