I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
