Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
