his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
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