How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
