I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
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That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
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Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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