i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
