70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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