just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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