It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
