If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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