..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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