NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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