Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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