We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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