My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
You did what with his pubic hair?
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