Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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