well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
