East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
