just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I would fuck him just for his dog
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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