When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
