omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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