Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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