i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
