I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
