Where are you?
In a non slutty way
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
