I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
