I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
she pinky promised me she was 18
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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