I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
