you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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