Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
