Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Randomize
