im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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