here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
your address is 607B right?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program