I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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