my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
