I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
