she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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