We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
