You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
